I’m a big Beatles fan. I grew up in and around Liverpool, the band’s hometown, and they are simply inescapable here. From museums, bus tours, roads named after them (and songs named after local roads), it can get a little much, even for me. But with a musical father intent on imbibing me with the best of the Fab Four from an early age, I grew up a fan.
The best Beatles album is Rubber Soul. That’s my opinion. I’ll also accept Abbey Road, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, or Revolver. The worst album? It’s simply got to be one of the movie tie-ins that terrible contracts forced the band to make. And, for my money, Magical Mystery Tour is worse than Yellow Submarine. Sue me.
While the ‘White Album’ has some bangers, there’s too much chaff on the B-side to come close to the intentionality of The Beatles’ best
Magical Mystery Tour has a couple of great songs – this is The Beatles, after all – it’s widely regarded as a poor album borne out of an ill-fated project. Fool On The Hill is a classic and I Am The Walrus has its quirky charm (and conspiracy theories to boot). Strawberry Fields Forever is the standout track, but wasn’t meant to be on the album at all as it was previously released with Penny Lane as a double A-side single. The record even irked the band itself! If John Lennon was annoyed by Magical Mystery Tour, we can all agree that it’s at the bottom of the pile, too.
In researching this article, it’s come to my attention that some fans appreciate the compilation style of Magical Mystery Tour, but I can’t say I get it. An album is more than just a collection of tracks, it’s a journey, an intentional exploration of musicality and emotion. Magical Mystery Tour may have a couple of good songs, as referenced above, but it doesn’t work as an album.
Obviously this is all a matter of opinion, and you’re entitled to your own, but I’m being hyperbolic, too. The title track of Magical Mystery Tour isn’t even the album’s worst song, let alone The Beatles’ – that honour goes to You Know My Name (Look Up The Number). But for the purposes of this article, a poor song compared to the rest of The Beatles’ catalogue from an ill-fated project masterminded by greedy executives perfectly represents the Minecraft movie.
The Minecraft movie looks terrible. It’s another gaming isekai, with uncanny valley semi-realism on Minecraft’s blocky enemies that give me the same ick as that first Sonic trailer when he had human teeth. Ugh. I just physically shuddered.
I know this is aimed at kids, but the script is awful, too. If one “he’s behind me, isn’t he?”-esque witty aside wasn’t enough, Minecraft treats us to two such reactions to the reveal of Jack Black’s turn as Steve. I can’t tell if this would be Joss Whedon’s wet dream or worst nightmare, but it’s certainly the latter for me.
We live in a time where gaming adaptations aren’t automatically panned critically any more. We have major hits like the Sonic franchise, which is funny but takes itself seriously enough to draw you in and make you care about its characters. We have prestige critical darling The Last of Us. And then… and then we have Borderlands. But if you can aim for any of the above, why sink to Pandora’s level?
The Minecraft movie could have been good. Heck, it could still be good. But the trailer doesn’t fill me with confidence. Weird CGI, painfully obvious greenscreens, abysmal dialogue, and soundtracked by one of the worst songs The Beatles ever made, it seems doomed to fail. I’d feel sorry for Jack Black, but after throwing his best friend under the bus and all but ending Tenacious D for the sake of his career, this is the kind of corporate-mandated slop he deserves.
The Beatles rushed out Magical Mystery Tour to appease executives who had written them into exploitative contracts. Minecraft may not have been made under the same circumstances, but the final result looks to be of similar quality: a cheaply thrown together cash grab. Hopefully Steve isn’t as ashamed of the result as John, Paul, George, and Ringo were of Magical Mystery Tour.
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