Summary
- Don’t worry, that one dark elf in Skingrad is still a freak in Oblivion Remastered.
- Better yet, a new generation of players is getting weirded out by her dialogue.
- Side note: How does the player know the fine for necrophilia in Cyrodiil?
Oblivion is full of very, very memorable NPCs. Whether it’s the wild chatter you overhear as you walk past townsfolk, or their AI causing them to get into all sorts of hijinks, we could all probably make our own compilation of Cyrodiil’s citizens being absolutely hilarious.
However, one of these weirdos is a freak by design, and it catches everyone off guard on their first playthrough. I am, of course, talking about Falanu Hlaalu, the dark elf woman with an… interesting hobby. Oh, why am I beating around the bush? She’s into necrophilia.
All These Years Later, This Oblivion NPC Is Still Freaking People Out
Falanu runs the store All Things Alchemical and can be found there during the day. At first, she comes across just like any other storekeeper, offering potions and anything you might need for alchemy. As with any other NPC, you can ask them about the town that they live in, but with Falanu, she’ll ask you a question once she’s done talking.
“By the way… do you happen to know what the fine is here in Cyrodiil for necrophilia? Just asking,” she throws at the player, completely unprompted. You have three options – one to be weirded out, one to say you have no idea, and one to go along with it, actually giving her the information she’s after. I thoroughly recommend that you go with the latter, just so you get to see this beloved freak in all her glory.
With Oblivion Remastered’s launch, she’s now weirding out a bunch of new players, as we see over on Reddit.
“I love seeing new players discover all Oblivion has to offer,” says Reddit user evergreengoth.
When I found her, she would only mention the Oblivion Gate outside of town, so you may have to deal with that before she tells you about her less-than-legal side gig.
Perhaps the best response of all comes from AHordeOfSeaMonkeys: “God forbid a woman have a hobby.”
Who knows why she says this to a stranger? Perhaps it was part of a cut quest. Perhaps it’s just a joke thrown in there by the devs. Either way, I am truly glad that this was kept intact, and new players get to meet this wonderfully strange woman.